I've always been the opposite of a minimalist: a maximalist. I believe my photography is in part a response to the culture I grew up in, an attempt to create a simpler and less overwhelming version of the world.
For the last couple of years, I've been trying to apply this to my life as well: I've minimized my possessions to a minimum, to a point where I'm able to travel light and yet I don't find myself missing anything.
While discarding clothes, notebooks and other stuff was relatively easy for me, there's one thing I struggle with: camera gear.
Excuses, excuses, excuses...
You see, I had very good excuses: "I don't even have that much gear", I liked to believe, "they are the tools I need to do my job", I told myself.
I do have a lot of camera gear, though. The problem is not the amount of cameras you've got, but everything that comes with them. Take the GoPro, for example: the camera is tiny and takes very little space. It's when we start adding all the mounts (tripod mount, backpack mount, car mount), the batteries, the memory cards, the charger, the cable for the charger... among many other accessories that we start seeing the real effect of adding a "small" camera to our kit. The complementary gear adds up really quick, and gets even worse when the camera takes different lenses.
But still, I can fit most of my gear in one camera bag, and I'm a photographer (plus vlogger) after all. I kept telling myself that it makes perfect sense that I have all this gear, they are the tools I need to do my job. But, are they? Do I really need all of them? Take the GoPro, again: I barely use it, and yet it comes everywhere with me. Take every other camera I have: I use them all and I can't tell which one I used to take the photographs without looking at the metadata. I don't have to meet any client's requirements or anything like that. So, what's the point?
The stress of unnecessary camera gear
This didn't use to be a big deal for me not too long ago: my backpack has always been heavy, way too heavy. I'm lucky I haven't hurt my back yet.
To think that I used to hike carrying the Bronica and 4 huge lenses, a tripod, a drone, a digital camera to record the videos, among many other things... To think that I used to leave no room in my bag for food and extra clothes so I could fit more lenses. I've found myself hungry and wet in the mountains but hey, at least I did have all those lenses with me, right?
I can't make up more excuses any longer. It's gotten to a point where it's really hard for me to justify everything I carry around, it's almost impossible to keep all this stuff organized, it's heavy, and it drives me crazy.
This unnecessary stress doesn't help me make better images, quite the contrary. I know I'd be better off with a simpler and lighter bag, or better yet, no bag at all. Less stress and more image making.
So, why haven't I done it?
It all comes down to insecurity
I now believe the real reason for putting this off for so long was my insecurity.
Will I be able to make good images with a lesser camera? Will I be able to capture all the scenes I might run into if I'm missing this or that lens? Will people think I'm a fraud if I'm not using a real camera? Will I still be considered a photographer?
Next steps
It's now clear to me that I can't keep lying to myself: in order to be a better artist, I need to downsize. Whatever others think of me doesn't matter.
I've finally made up my mind, and for this upcoming fall trip I'm leaving 95% of my camera gear behind. Not quite discarding it yet, even though I hope to do it soon if everything goes well on this trip. I expect to miss some of my lenses and cameras at some point, but I trust my creativity to overcome those problems and still be able to create images I'm proud of.
Those images are finally taking center stage, and camera gear is stepping to the side. For a long time, hopefully.
I'll keep you updated.